Not every round has to be a fight.
In the summer of 2016, I hit what I consider to be the best mental game shot I’ve ever hit.
It was a tough situation – 17th hole, par 5, forced carry over water, 5 iron. Normally I’d tighten up, overthink, and try to force the outcome. But this time, something else happened. My body felt loose, my mind was still, and there was no battle going on inside me. Just peace. The swing happened almost on its own, and for a moment, golf felt completely effortless.
And then… splash. It came up short and went in the water.
What’s crazy is that the peace I had experienced during the shot continued all the way through the result. Before then and since then, I would probably be fighting frustration, self-criticism, maybe even dwelling on the shot for a hole or two. And I would definitely be trying to correct the mistake by working on my swing for most of the round.
When I shared this experience with Jayne Storey on my podcast The Mental Golf Show, she described what I was experiencing as a combination of inner quietude and athletic readiness. Not zoning out, not going slack — but being fully present and physically prepared, without the tension or panic that usually creeps in.
A term she used was vigilant passivity. Another way she described it was relaxed readiness. A word I remember using to describe it was equanimity.
These are fancy words, but basically I was putting forth effort in the form of picking a target and swinging, but I was totally detached from the result. There wasn’t an ounce of expectation, judgment, or need for the ball to go somewhere. I was simply giving the shot everything I had, and letting go of the rest.
The encouraging part? Experiences like this aren’t random. They can be cultivated. What led to me being able to do that was a combination of meditation, breathing practices, deep and deliberate work on my game, and most importantly a bigger picture of acceptance of results.
You can actually build this capacity — to meet pressure with equanimity, to feel steady even when everything in you wants to tighten up.
Golf doesn’t always have to feel like a fight. Sometimes it can feel like peace in motion.
One thing for you to work on this week:
Before your next round, pause for 60 seconds. Breathe slowly, soften your body, and let your weight settle into the ground. Start your round from that state — quiet inside, ready outside.